Darkness
by EspoirDio
Summary: Just a quick oneshot set during/after 1x22: A Land Without Magic.


A/N: Hi guys :) I don't really know this fandom very much but I just had this idea...it's just a brief moment set after 1x22.

**Darkness**

She wasn't quite sure how she'd been expecting to feel once she'd made it back to her mansion. Safe definitely wasn't it. That first moment at the hospital when she had realised that everyone suddenly remembered her and in consequence also remembered her true nature a sense of panic had overwhelmed her. A feeling so strong that the only possible solution had been to flee like a coward, a feat she preferred to associate with her nemesis Rumpelstiltskin rather than herself. She wasn't usually one to back down from battle but Henry had made her softer, love had made her softer and Emma Swan had added a whole new layer of chaos on top of it. Regina's thoughts kept swirling around everything that had happened and about everything that was likely to happen still. And not for the first time she felt that her life had been too long, that too many things had transpired and that she was simply tired.

The endlessness of the darkness that seemed to surround her pressed her down against the soft sheets of the bed her son had occupied for many years and another sting pierced her heart. She was going to lose him too; it was inevitable, really. Feeling the old sense of panic resurface she closed her eyes and tried to take deep calming breaths but ended up covering her mouth when another sob of despair threatened to escape. Her mother had been right, love w_as_ weakness and she was better off without it. Then, suddenly, as she started to consider everything that she had lost something odd happened. The panic faded away and in its place a strange emptiness started to settle. The indifference she now experienced seemed to gently numb her body and acted much more soothingly than the paralysing fear had done before. Regina felt that she had nothing to lose anymore. She wasn't going to barricade herself in her mansion or cower behind curtains. She was just going to lie there in her son's bed who had brought her the most joy and pride in her life and await her punishment, her execution.

The knock on her front door still came sooner than she had expected but she didn't move to run or to open it. The knocking persisted for a moment but then the intruder just let herself in. Regina barely listened to the footsteps that seemed to search every corner of the mansion until they subsided in front of her room and so she didn't even notice that the search party she was expecting seemed to consist of only one person.

"Madam Mayor?"

Regina's eyebrows lifted slightly but nothing else betrayed her surprise at hearing Emma Swan's voice. She had figured that Snow and Charming were much more likely to take her captive as it seemed to be a task that both of them enjoyed.

"Regina?" Emma repeated and the brunette felt strangely violated by the sudden use of her first name.

"If you came to take me away, Miss Swan, I'll make it easy for you." The bitterness slipped effortlessly into her tone.

"I didn't...actually," Emma replied, sounding as surprised by that statement as Regina felt.

"Well, I don't suppose you stopped by for a cup of tea either." Regina continued, more defensive than she had been before Emma Swan had set foot into her house. It seemed that it was far too irresistible not to fight with her.

"_No,"_ Emma replied pointedly, still standing in the doorway "I came because of Henry."

Regina didn't speak but her eyes showed her sudden concern.

"He's fine," her voice sounded strained as if trying to ignore the light rush of affection she had felt at the other woman's concern "he just wanted you to be too."

Again, Regina chose not to answer.

"You're lucky that you have him. He's the only reason why no-one is going to harm you...for now."

Another silence stretched between them and Emma shifted her weight awkwardly from one foot to the other.

"But given the circumstances I still think it's better if you won't see Henry for a while."

Even though Regina's head snapped up her voice sounded cool and unaffected. "Then I prefer you hand me over to the others now, Sheriff Swan."

"If you expect me to feel sorry for you," Emma started, taking a step towards the bed.

"I think your parents are much more suited for those kind of theatricalities. I am merely stating facts, my dear. If you prohibit me from seeing my son I have nothing left to live for."

"Why?" Emma exclaimed unable to hide her sudden annoyance with the woman who had always been a worthy adversary and whose apathy felt unnerving as if the ground had been pulled from under her feet. Regina wasn't supposed to be like this. She was supposed to be strong and exciting and constantly challenging. The loss of her old personality felt to Emma as if something vital was slipping through her fingers.

"Because, Miss Swan, I am tired of this circle repeating again and again. I keep trying and losing and trying and losing and I have been at this long before you even appeared in this world! I am exhausted!"

Her voice sounded hoarse and rough around the edges as if it would run dry if she continued talking for another moment. But the desperation in her eyes tugged at Emma's heart because she suddenly sensed a certain connection. The lost girl inside her that had spent all of her life wandering around in search of a home, in search of a place where she belonged finally felt close to someone, felt understood. Without knowing how she'd gotten there, Emma sank down on the bed next to Regina.

"You'll do it again," she said calmly and watched as the other one's eyes rose up to meet hers in confusion.

"Have you not been listening, Miss Swan? I am done. You can take me with you to the station right away."

"You're stronger than that, Regina," the blonde simply said "and you care about Henry. He believes in you, he believes that you can change. Don't disappoint him."

Her hands grazed Regina's for a brief moment before she strode out of the room and the mansion again. Regina kept looking after her, uncertain of what had just transpired and surprised to find that the hopelessness she had been experiencing was fading away. Sometimes, it seemed, it only took one person to believe in her to chase some of the darkness away.


End file.
